So first off I want to thank everyone who is praying for me. I really really appreciate it and can definitely say that your prayers are helping! Since my last post I now have someone helping me 1 hour a night with lesson planning until Thursday and I have straightened some things in my head on what the purpose of this institute is. Now it is a good thing that I have this fairly straight in my head now but it doesn't necessarily mean I like the conclusion I came to. I cannot elaborate anymore.
So this past weekend I was freaking out so much over what I was supposed to teach, how I was supposed to teach it, and how I could take some control of my class with assertiveness. I went to church yesterday evening and at Sunday school the message from God was so loud and clear to me. He was asking me if I wanted to live my life on faith or fear. I had been living in fear all weekend thinking about going back to school on Monday not sure of what I was going to say or how I was going to say it. Well I prayed about everything and asked God to help me put my faith completely in him. I had pretty much continually been doing this the whole weekend and I was doubting whether I could actually do it. My biggest fear was going in to my classroom and trying to get 24 kids to stay quiet and raise their hands when they wanted to talk. I feared that I would get all this backlash and I wouldnt know how to respond and I would just give in. Well today right before my class I told God "Here we go" and sure enough at the beginning of class I started my lecture on how we were going to start raising out hands in class or I was going to hand out consequences. I stood firm and held one student after class. I think I made a big step today in my teaching career. I learned that I can be assertive and that the students WILL listen to me.
I am feeling much of my anxieties lifted off my shoulders and it is amazing. I am in love with my God. Its neat! Oh by the way I have a place to live after institute. A friend from church has an extra bedroom. I am very blessed to have known people down here already! I miss you all and hope to talk to you sometime in the near future. AKA after July 14th.
Peace
MO
3 comments:
Your title for this post rhymes with the title of your last post. I think you should make it a theme...
Also, I am glad that class is going better. You show those kids who's boss. :)
Maybe you can hand out cheese as a reward for good behavior/study habits?
Glad to hear things are going better :)
I am SO excited to hear how much has changed since last Sunday for your classroom! God is good and I am so pumped to know that some of your anxieties have been lifted!
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